An American’s Guide to Oktoberfest
A great article from our friend Casey at CaseyFrolickingAbroad.com! Casey describes her experience at the 2011 Oktoberfest in Munich, Germany.
Having spent the evening prior on a Brewery Tour of Munich, Kelley and I dragged our lifeless zombie bodies to Oktoberfest. Upon reporting for duty at the Oktoberfest Fairgrounds, we scouted out the scene. After we assessed our combined knowledge of three German words and walking through two intimidating, clearly German tents we headed to the place most tourists head first, the Hafbrau house.
We worked our way into the coveted middle table section through a friend we met on the train and refused to budge from our seats after that. As the day went on the table saw many different faces and countries. It also became the perfect place to sing, dance, and make friends with people four tables over. I’m happy to say we survived and represented Team America very well. The following is an American’s guide to Oktoberfest:
1. Know that your day will be spent greeting every American you meet with the phrase “America, f*** yeah!
Our Asian tourist friends
2. If you find yourself being photographed by Asian tourists, consider this a gift from the Oktoberfest Gods. Leap at the opportunity to play with them, because lets be honest: the only thing better than an asian tourist is an intoxicated asian tourist.
3. Be careful not to drink glass. This one is serious. Glass be flyin as happy campers be ‘prostin’.
4. Sing along to more terrible American songs in one hour than you have in a lifetime in America. I’m not sure who decided it was a good idea to export Sweet Caroline and Sweet Home Alabama to other countries, but it is probably the reason everyone thinks we are so cool.
5. Do like every attendee full of beer-fueled bravery and attempt to steal the stein that has treated you so very well for the past hour or two. Chances are you won’t make it with guards plucking them out of 98% of peoples hands as they attempt to make their escape. If you make it out with the stein intact, parade around the Oktoberfest grounds with your new trophy of beer-glory
6. Have the most epic dance party you will have in all of Europe in front of a carnival ride
7) Put your body on a super fast, spinny carnival ride. You won’t regret it. (Didn’t do this, but heard its quite pleasant)
What? Surprise gnome garden?
8. Find yourself in a creepy, creepy part of the park dedicated to gnomes. Spend a good couple minutes standing there before you realize it is in your best interest to evacuate the gnome premises
So after avoiding death by both airborne glass shard and fiendish gnomes, go to bed knowing that you made America proud.